
32
So…I kind of died today. Like, literally. The paramedics woke me from a diabetic coma this morning. You know what is the best line to start your day? “Does he sleep naked?”
I feel horrible for my sister. She had no fucking clue what was going on. She called the ambulance and made pancakes after I was awake. I think this teaches everyone a diabetic safety lesson. I told my sister we need more snacks and cake frosting. That way, in the event of another incident like today, she should shove cake frosting at my face and I should die like I lived. Drowning on frosting.


